From my journal this afternoon, about 12:30 PM:
So, here I am at the Confederate Memorial Park in North Alabama, sitting up against a tree on one of the walking trails. I can hear various birds singing around me. It's about 12:30 in the afternoon.
The most obvious question that arises is: Why am I here? I've never had a particular affinity for the out-of-doors. The thought of going camping doesn't appeal to me, and most of my life I've been quite content with my creature comforts of air conditioning and indoor plumbing, thank you. And I'm probably a bit more paranoid about the possibility of encountering snakes or ticks than I need to be.
So, why am I here?
Am I attempting to "force" myself into a supposedly Wiccan/Pagan mode of "loving the earth" -- or am I merely trying to learn how to appreciate it?
It is quiet and peaceful here, and I can appreciate that.
I'm here because I do have some appreciation for nature, however peripheral. Most any kind of plant, tree or bird - I have no idea what type they are or what they are called. All I would call them at this point is "tree" or "bird."
I'm here because I'm seeking a kind of solidarity which I hope the earth can give me, or can begin to nurture within me.
I'm here because of a couple of recent items I've stumbled across that speak of nature's spirit as having a calming, healing affect - and not merely in a theoretical context, but by those who have actually experienced it.
I'm here to take the first steps towards (I hope) a greater awareness of the earth, the wheel of the year - and myself.
May the spirit of this place and the God and Goddess themselves bless my efforts, however feeble, however steeped in ignorance they may be. May these be my first steps...toward wisdom.
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